Monday, December 14, 2009

Anger and Destruction

They go hand in hand, don't they?

I know I haven't posted in a while, but I'm a little annoyed today, so what the heck?

Before anger, there is always a catalyst. People don't just get angry for no reason, you know. They have reasons and/or body chemicals that cause them to behave the way they do.

For instance; I have a character named Hikami. She is based off of myself, and I often put myself into her situations in order to understand what she would do. She is a half-breed; a cross between a human and a dragon. Her own mother hated and abused her because of her father's draconic nature, but she never once tried to hurt her, even though Hikami was vastly more powerful. One day, I wondered what might drive her to kill, and I got a story out of it. Essentially, a man had crippled her younger sister's legs, and she flew into a blind rage and murdered him. True, I do not have the weapons nor the mindset to actually kill someone, but I do understand her reasoning, because I have a younger sister. I shudder to think of what I would do to someone who hurt her. (More on the theory of the oldest sibling complex some other time.)

Before destruction, there is anger. I've been told that anger erodes the soul, and perhaps that's true. But when you're in the midst of righteous fury, do you think about the condition of your soul? I'll hazard a guess that your answer is a resounding NO. Anger is a natural response to a painful situation.

Anger is a powerful emotion, and, when tamed and put to good use, it can be a powerful ally. However, it is not something that you should just let out. I don't claim to be a master of my own anger (I am a teenager, after all) but it's something I work towards.

The reason I posted this? I'm ANGRY. I sat and listened to a lecture for what felt like a really long time, and then I find out that the person I was getting the lecture for had already left. Needless to say, I'm kind of annoyed at that.

Anger is something everyone understands, right? I don't need to describe to you how right it feels in the heat of the moment, or how bad you feel once it's left you. That's where the destruction comes in. People make bad decisions when they're angry. It's a fact. When I'm mad, I usually want to tear, stab, smash, break or hit something. However, if I hold myself back, it lessens the aftereffects of the anger by a lot.

I'm not trying to be a know-it-all, and I'm not saying that I'm any better than anyone else, but this is my message to anyone who cares to listen.

Please, understand that people rarely mean what they say when they're upset. Please realize that people aren't perfect, and people just want to be forgiven. Please be willing to forgive people, and don't forget to be aware of the mistakes that you make. Apologies go a long way.

Don't expect forgiveness; ask for it. That's the only way you can be sure you've actually received it.

This post dedicated to
Anyone who made it to the end
You deserve congratulations just for sticking with me
The ones who know who 'people' are
You know who I'm talking about
The ones who care about me
You're getting some kinda blessings for having not killed me at birth ;)
Teenagers everywhere who feel like it's a chore to keep breathing
It won't be like this forever, I swear
My orchestra director, Mr. C
Practical advice never seemed so practical!
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—the Lioness


lotusgirl said...

I love you completely. I'm so glad I didn't kill you at birth. Well, really about 3 months after. Or 2 years after. Or 7 years after. Or 15 years after. Heehee. We all have our weaknesses. You sure know mine, and we definitely share several. Forgiveness rules.

Mew Hana said...

Gee, I know this a little late, but I'm really sorry. I forget why I had to leave Gmail that night, but I had absolutely NO IDEA that I had made you THAT upset!

...Will you except a very LATE apology from a really sorry friend?